Series: Love Heals the Shattered Soul
Fandom: Criminal Minds
Year: Season 7 (2012)
Pairings: Aaron Hotchner/Spencer Reid,
Spoilers: Up Through Season 7
Summary: At Jack’s sleepover, things go a little bit different than planned and it does wonders for Aaron and Spencer’s relationship.
“No, the boys are having a great deal of fun so far. Damien was dropped off first.”
Aaron heard Spencer talking and knew that he had to be talking to someone on the phone. The younger man was in his office, sitting in the chair twirling side to side. Aaron leaned against the door jam and looked at him. The smile on his face told Aaron that he was talking to JJ.
“No. The boys are sleeping in the living room in a pillow fort I am going to help them construct. Aaron’s sleeping in his bed and I’m taking the guest room.” Spencer laughed and finally noticed Aaron standing in the doorway. “They are all tuckered out after the park. I think they are watching a movie.”
Aaron nodded. He’d just got the boys settled down after the park. Damien had brought shorts to wear and a t-shirt. That had sort of shocked Aaron. Damien explained though that he didn’t want to get his dress ruined and that running and playing in a dress was just sort of crazy. Aaron had laughed and showed the boy where he could change. That was when Jack had changed out of his dress as well. All three of them had gotten pretty dirty while playing so when they got back, Aaron had let them take a bath. The bathroom had only been marginally destroyed.
It was the first that Aaron had heard that Spencer was staying the night. He figured that it had less to do with wanting to stay with Aaron and more with the fact that the boys had begged. It was late but not that late and Aaron was sure that the boys would be asleep before the end of the second movie in their marathon. The fort was going to be constructed in between the movies as well as popcorn made. Dinner had been a picnic in the park and then dessert sushi made after.
“No, I’m still going to go with Henry and you tomorrow. Damien and Adam should be gone by then and even if not, I’m sure that Aaron can handle them.”
Aaron smiled at Spencer and nodded his head that he was going back to the living room. Spencer smiled at him. Aaron moved silently through the house more of wanting to see what the boys were up to when he heard whispering. He moved to listen at the doorway.
“It was a very pretty dress, Jack. You don’t wear much purple at school. Why did you choose it as the color for your dress?” Damien asked.
Peeking around the corner, Aaron saw that the three boys were sitting up with their blankets wrapped around them in a circle.
“I like the color and while it doesn’t seem like it, it’s Papa’s favorite color. He just doesn’t wear it at work that much going for neutral colors like shades of white, black, and brown. He has a favorite scarf though that Dad bought for him and he wears it a lot.”
Papa? Aaron wondered exactly how long the boy had been calling Spencer that at school because Damien and Adam didn’t question who was who in that. He smiled and closed his eyes. Jack probably hadn’t even broached the subject with Spencer. He wanted to tell Jack that it would be fine but he wasn’t Spencer and he didn’t know the reaction that it would have with him. He let the discussion of favorite colors wash over him. He had bought that scarf for Spencer because he looked good in purple and it was something that Spencer could wear and have it be a subtle claim that he was Aaron’s.
The ringing of the doorbell shocked Aaron. He wondered who exactly was at the door and started towards it. The boys stayed seated where they were but their eyes were firmly locked on the door. Aaron used the peephole to see that it was Jessica and she had a bag of something with her. Opening the door, Aaron smiled at her.
“Aaron. I came by to drop some things off for the boys for lunch tomorrow.” Jessica held up the grocery bags. Aaron wondered if the women in his life thought that he couldn’t provide good enough for the boys for a whole day.
“Aunt Jessica!” all three boys cried out and it made Aaron laugh. He knew that Damien and Adam spent a lot of time hanging out with Jack at school and the adoption of Jessica as their aunt as well was cute.
The thundering of running feet had Aaron jumping out of the way to let the boys tackle her into a hug. He took the bag just as Jack reached her first. Then it was a mass of talking boys who were trying to describe what they had done all day in round. He carried the bag into the kitchen to start putting up the things she had brought. The sandwich meat in the fridge, the chips on top, the bread into the bread box. It was an almost match for exactly what Jack and Spencer had bought that morning.
“I’m guessing from the screams that Jessica showed up?” Spencer asked from the second doorway into the kitchen. Aaron smiled as he closed the bread box.
“Yes. With lunch food for the boys.”
Spencer hummed as he moved closer to Aaron. He reached out with a hand and cupped the side of Aaron’s face, pulling him into a kiss. Aaron let him have control of the kiss for a few seconds before he shifted them to where Spencer was pressed into the fridge and when he gasped he took advantage. The younger man settled his hands around Aaron’s neck and pulled his head closer. There was no hesitance to his movements and Aaron cried out in happiness inside. There was none of the tension from the night before left.
A giggle broke through Aaron’s mind and he broke apart their lips, looking to where the three boys and Jessica were looking at them.
“Yes?” Aaron asked. He felt Spencer bury his head in his neck, his cheeks aflame. He was used to Jack interrupting their kisses but never an audience.
“We made a decision and we want Aunt Jessica to stay the night as well,” Jack said and the two other boys nodded their heads in concert.
“Why don’t you three go back to your movie and we will discuss that,” Aaron said and the boys took off towards the living room.
“I didn’t expect him to want that and I will not stay if it’s better.”
“No, it’s fine. Spencer can take my bed and I’ll take the couch. You can take the guest room.”
“Oh.” Jessica looked confused. She looked between the two men and then it was like a light had gone off. “Jack said you two were sharing a bed.”
“No.” Aaron looked at Spencer and saw him shaking his head. “But we can. The boys want you to stay here and I’m worn out from a day of shopping and then playing. I’ll sleep anywhere. No one needs to sleep on a couch.”
Aaron wasn’t going to ask if he was sure. He wouldn’t say it if he wasn’t and questioning it sounded like he thought Spencer didn’t know his own mind. He also wasn’t going to say no.
Spencer said his goodnights hours later, long before the boys were out, but Jack just bounded up from his nest of blankets and kissed his cheek goodnight. The other boys wanted hugs and Jessica got a pat on the shoulder. Aaron received a kiss to his cheek that ended in a brush of their lips. It was exactly like every other time Spencer went to bed before him when he was staying over at Aaron’s or Aaron was staying at his.
When Aaron followed once the boys were asleep, the TV off, and the alarm set, he found Spencer in a pair of the pajamas pants he’d left so long before. He was asleep in the center of the bed and Aaron couldn’t help but smile as he moved around the room and bathroom getting ready for bed. He laid down when he was ready and didn’t move to touch the younger man. He moved to his side so that he wouldn’t accidentally touch him and willed himself to sleep.
Aaron woke up feeling warmth and weight all down his body. His face itched and all he could smell was cinnamon. Turning his head, he buried his face more into Spencer’s hair and sighed in happiness. He hadn’t thought that he’d ever get to feel it again. Spencer was wrapped around him, their legs tangled. Head on Aaron’s shoulder and arm a possessive hold on Aaron’s hip, hand was slipped under his pants.
Spencer’s erection was pressed into his opposite hip and his own was tenting his pants.
“Morning,” Spencer said as he leaned up and kissed Aaron. He shifted and instead of being on Aaron’s side, was sprawled on him with his thigh pressing on Aaron’s erection. The genius kept moving until he was straddling Aaron, their groins pressed together.
Aaron groaned but he needed to see Spencer’s eyes. Those eyes couldn’t lie him. Moving a hand up to pull his face back to see him. Spencer’s eyes were alive and happy, lust filled and so beautiful. Spencer leaned down again and kissed him, licking into his mouth. His hips started a lazy thrusting rhythm.
“Aaron,” Spencer begged as he propped himself up onto his arms to look into Aaron’s face. “Please.”
Aaron leaned up, forcing the younger to sit up. He scooted back and pulled Spencer to straddle him again once he was braced against the headboard. Before he settled down though, the genius pulled his own and then Aaron’s shirts off. Aaron ran his hand down smooth chest before he kissed over Spencer’s heart. He pulled him in close and Spencer tensed.
“Can we switch? I want to be under you.”
Grabbing thighs, Aaron tipped him back and settled above him. Spencer wrapped his legs around him, all tenseness gone from his body and a large smile on his face. Aaron wriggled an arm under Spencer’s head to brace himself and used the other to map his skin. He allowed Spencer to pull him down into a kiss. He was going to let him set the pace. This was more nerve wracking than the first time that they’d fumbled around. He was so afraid of doing something wrong. Something that would remind the younger man of that night.
“I’m not glass.” Spencer trailed a hand down his back to settle it on his cloth covered ass. “If you do anything I don’t like, I’ll tell you just like before. Nothing has changed on that front. Second guessing yourself is going to make this not as pleasurable. And I want pleasure.”
Aaron smiled but didn’t answer, except to lean down and take up kissing him again. Spencer thrust up first and Aaron couldn’t hold back the answering one. They rocked together as they kissed, swallowing each other’s moans and gasps of pleasure. It was like they had never been apart.
Spencer’s hands were sure as they traced the muscles on his back before trailing down to slip under his pants and cup his ass cheeks pulling him in just a little tighter as his legs dropped away to just grip his hips. The feel of Spencer’s hands on naked flesh tipped Aaron over.
“Spencer.” Aaron moved his hand from the younger man’s side to his hip, pulling him close as his hips stuttered in their rhythm as he came in his pants. Spencer buried his head in Aaron’s neck and gasped as he followed Aaron over.
Aaron felt the smile against his neck just seconds before the fingers on his ass curled and then he had nails raking up his cheeks and back.
“Good morning,” Spencer said, a big smile on face as Aaron shifted to lay on his side beside him. Spencer rolled to his side and curled into him. He couldn’t help placing a kiss on the top of his head.
“I’ve been wanting to talk to you about something for a while now and I think it’s time. My therapist and I have talked.” Aaron held Spencer’s head still when he tried to tip it up to look at him. He ran a hand down his side and tried to calm him. “The only thought that ran through my mind that night was that I wasn’t good enough for someone else. That every single thing I was able to give wasn’t enough for you. The thought that you needed someone else to make you happy, that you needed sex with someone else hurt me so bad. I hurt so much when Haley divorced me and when the full breadth of her cheating came out, I couldn’t be angry. And then I saw who I now know is JJ, in bed with you and I got so hurt that I became so angry. You made me happy. Jack loved you and all I could see was pain. It’s not an excuse, I should have listened. If I had stayed around for even a few minutes, I would have seen JJ and knew that you would never sleep with her. JJ is your sister. She’d never cheat on Will. My anger could have hurt you far worse.” Aaron ran a hand down to the crook of Spencer’s arm. Where the scars were faint.
Aaron wasn’t ready for Spencer to shove him onto his back and straddle him. He braced his hands on Aaron’s shoulders and stared at him. There was a wealth of emotion in his eyes and Aaron wasn’t sure that he’d ever seen that much emotion in him.
“Haley, rest her soul, had her faults but none of them are to be laid at your feet. Haley cheating on you was not your fault. She should have stepped up and asked for the divorce before she strayed outside the marriage for what she wanted. It’s been months for us. We’ve been dancing around for a while and if we hadn’t had sex today, would you have gone out and found someone else? We’ve not said a thing about exactly what we are. We’ve not said a thing about exclusivity. Would you have found someone else for sex?”
“NO!” Aaron near yelled. He didn’t like that thought. Of being with someone else like that. He only wanted Spencer. Aaron looked up at him and he got it. He got what his therapist had been trying to get him to understand for months. What Dave had been trying to get him to understand for years. What Spencer had tried and given up getting him to get. “I’d never do that to you. And I know you’d never do it to me.”
Aaron wrapped his arms around Spencer and crushed him close. The man went willingly and buried his nose in his neck. Nothing needed said. Soon enough the kids would wake and the world would intrude. Then Spencer would have to leave to spend the day with Henry. He didn’t care that his release was sticky in his sleep pants, he didn’t want to let go of Spencer.
“The door is shut and I can’t hear anything so that means the kids are asleep or hiding,” Spencer said a smile evident from the tone of his voice. “I need coffee.”
“First we need to shower. If you shower first, I’ll get the pot started before I shower.”
“So our standard Sunday morning routine?”
“Yes.” Aaron watched him as he moved across the room into the bathroom, not bothering to grab clothes or anything. That meant he’d come out in just a towel. Aaron knew that they were still on rocky ground and how he acted now was going to either push them farther along at a quicker pace or stop them dead in their tracks. Just because Spencer felt comfortable having sex once didn’t mean it would happen again any time soon. It was his first sexual encounter since that night. He was going to have a freak out and Aaron wanted to be there when he did but he had no clue when it was going to happen. Just because he had no actual memory of the night didn’t mean that his brain had filled in places. He’d already seen the aftereffects of some of the nightmares.
The knock on his bedroom door had Aaron grabbing his robe and slipping it on before opening the door. Jack was there and he tried to hide the peek he did around Aaron but wasn’t able to.
“Spencer’s in the shower. You boys awake?”
“We already cleaned up the pillow fort and we are hungry.”
“I’m going to start some coffee so we can see what Garcia had Spencer bring over.”
Jack smiled and nodded before he turned around and ran back towards the living room. Aaron noticed the guest room door was open. Adam and Damien were waiting in the kitchen with Jack when he entered. Jessica was leaning against the counter and handed him a cup of coffee. He looked into it and saw that it was black.
“Spencer’s is over there!” Adam said and pointed at the coffee pot. Aaron looked to see that Spencer’s old cup was filled and ready beside the carafe.
“Go take it to him and I’ll feed the horde,” Jessica said with a smile on her face.
Aaron nodded and took the cup as well as his own towards the bathroom. The shower was shutting off as he stepped into the room, shutting the door behind him. He knocked on the door to the bathroom and heard a muffled cry that sounded like Come In so he did. Spencer was standing there with a towel around his waist and was running one all over his head. He looked at Aaron and smiled. His heart nearly stopped in his chest at the pure happiness on Spencer’s face in that moment.
The high from that smile carried Aaron through the morning all the way up until Spencer started to get ready to leave. Adam, Damien, and Jessica were long gone and it had been wonderful to do lunch with just Jack and Spencer. The looks that Jack kept giving the two of them told Aaron that he knew something was different. Better but different. Jack kept his resolve when Spencer left, just hugging him for several minutes before letting him go. Aaron pressed a kiss to his cheek but Spencer turned it into full press of lips.
“I’ll see you in the morning, Aaron.”
“See you then.”
Aaron regretted that he had to shut the door but if he didn’t he was going to demand that he and Jack go with him.
“Did you have fun, Jack?” Aaron asked, focusing on Jack. If he focused on Jack, the hole left by Spencer’s departure wouldn’t be gone but it would be less noticeable.
“I did. I just don’t understand why Damien likes to wear dresses but I didn’t mind wearing it.”
“I don’t know. Adam had fun with his and he liked wearing it. I don’t think that wearing it once is going to help me make up my mind. Can I wear it whenever I want?”
“I know that you know things. You and Spencer. Why does Damien like to wear dresses?”
“Why do you like the color blue? Why does Spencer like purple? It’s something that’s different about him. It’s nothing to be ashamed of. All you need to understand is that he likes to wear them and accept him.”
“I do. I like him and I like him in shorts or a dress.”
“Then that’s all that matters.” Aaron leaned over and kissed Jack’s hair. He let a big smile grace his face. He was doing okay with Jack and trying to show him that he used to smile. It was easier with Spencer in his life, it made the days worth smiling even when Jack wasn’t looking. Before Spencer, life was only happy when he was with Jack. He was content with his job. “So how long have you been calling Spencer ‘Papa’ at school?”
Jack looked up at him, his face full of confusion. Then his face softened and he shrugged his shoulders. “Adam and I talked. I haven’t asked Spencer yet but I like calling him it.”
“It’s a big thing, Jack. Once you do, you can’t take it back. You can’t get mad at him and start calling him Spencer.”
“It’s not nice to hurt someone like that,” Jack said. There was a look on his face that Aaron didn’t know. Then he got it. Aaron knew that Jack knew exactly what he was meaning. Aaron had given his love and taken it away in anger. Jack had seen what it had done.
“Only you can ask him. You’ll know when the time is right.”