Chapter Twenty Five-Blindsided
Spencer heard the knock on his door and looked at the time. It was eight in the evening. Hotch had made the comment that Jack was spending the weekend with the extended Brooks family at some kind of reunion. Spencer had wondered how long it would take for Hotch to arrive at his place. JJ’s leaving the team had hurt Spencer. It hurt everyone, including Hotch and he knew that Hotch would want to alleviate that pain by using him. And he was okay with drowning his own pain in Hotch. It wasn’t healthy but losing JJ like she had been lost to the team was something that Spencer had never seen coming. He’d deal with it later, acceptance, and all the other levels of grief but for now, he wanted to rebel.
When he opened the door, Spencer wasn’t expecting to see Hotch standing there with wine in one hand and a bag of what smelled like Thai takeaway in the other. Spencer turned to allow the man in and was a little shocked when the man stopped in front of him and kissed his cheek before moving towards, not the couch, but the table. Spencer followed him and grabbed two wine glasses from his cabinets. He filled both of their glasses while Hotch plated up the food. It looked like he’d got several things, all of which Spencer liked, and he was putting a little bit of each on each of their plates. Spencer was thinking too hard and didn’t realize that Hotch had moved. He gave into the pressure on his shoulder and sat down as Hotch pushed in his chair for him.
Hotch was acting like it was a date, but yet hadn’t said a single word to him. He hadn’t thought that the man was that shook up by JJ that he felt like he needed to woo Spencer before fucking him. Or he thought that Spencer was so shook up that he needed wooing.
“What’s all of this?”
“You’ve not been eating and I know it. Even Prentiss pointed it out to Morgan. You need to eat.”
“I’m just not…”
“You are eating,” Hotch said.
Spencer snapped his mouth shut and picked up the fork as he looked down at the food. Hotch hadn’t given him a lot. He stabbed at a bite and stuck it in his mouth. He worked on eating and didn’t pay any attention to Hotch, knowing that a good conversation wasn’t needed before fucking. Several bites in, he realized that he was hungrier than he thought he was. He didn’t get anymore though once he’d cleaned his plate. Hotch poured him a second glass of wine but when it was gone, he didn’t fill it a third time. He didn’t fill his own a third either. Spencer shrugged it off. He’d put his foot down long ago about sex while compromised so he just chalked it up to that.
Getting up to clean his plate and his fork, Spencer was lost in watching the water go down the drain when a body pressed against him and hands set Hotch’s things in the sink. He leaned back into the strong body.
“I was thinking that I wanted to do something different tonight. Do you have any good dancing music?”
“Dancing music? Like heavy beats like Morgan likes to dance to?” Spencer asked as he turned around.
“No, I mean like slow dancing, waltzing, that kind of music.”
“Umm, sure. I have some over here on CD.” Spencer pointed and was kind of shocked when Hotch stepped back to allow him to go over to the section. The man didn’t stray very far from him as he did it. He watched as Hotch’s fingers caressed down the side of each spine of the cases as he looked for whatever he was looking for. Spencer kind of tuned it out. His mind was slipping back to work and going into the office each day and not seeing JJ there.
“You with me, Spencer?” Hotch asked.
“Yes.” Spencer turned his face back up and found that Hotch wasn’t where he had been the last time that he had seen him. Instead, he was in the middle of the living room and the coffee table was pushed away. He was holding his hand out and Spencer reached out and took it, stepping closer. He was pulled into Hotch’s arms. The strains of classical music was coming from his speakers that were around the room. A gift a few years back from Morgan who had said that even with Spencer’s classical tastes, a good sound system made the music.
“Dance with me?” Hotch asked as he laid a hand on Spencer’s lower back and slotted him just that much closer. Spencer hesitated on where to put his hands for a few seconds before he set them on Hotch’s shoulders. Hotch though used his free hand and pushed at Spencer’s elbow to where his arms slipped all the way around his neck. Hotch laid his cheek against Spencer’s and started to move them.
Spencer had never danced like this with anyone. He’d never gone to any of the dances in high school, even he knew better than that and even in college, he’d never gone to parties and whatnot. He followed Hotch’s lead though and was thankful that he didn’t have shoes on so the few times he stepped on Hotch’s toes, it didn’t hurt as much as it could have. He relaxed more and more as each section of the songs finished and started onto the next. He closed his eyes and dropped one of his arms to wrap around Hotch’s back so that he could lay his head on his shoulder.
This wasn’t like anything else that they had ever done. It wasn’t arousing but it was exciting. He could feel that he was half hard but there was no ache involved with it. Instead, it was pleasant. He started to rub his hand up and down Hotch’s back, sort of in time with the music. Hotch’s left hand was on his hip while his right was wrapped around Spencer much like his was around the man. It was maddening, just slowly moving around the room at Hotch’s whim but it was relaxing as well.
Hotch tilted his head up off his shoulder, drawing him in for a kiss. It wasn’t like any kiss they had ever done before. It was more sweet and gentle. It wasn’t meant to arouse or even excite. It was just an extension of what they were doing. Being close, being intimate.
Three more songs on the CD played with Hotch kissing him and him kissing Hotch back. Spencer was still just half hard and where they were brushing against each other as they moved, he could feel that Hotch wasn’t fully hard either. He wasn’t sure what exactly this was but he was enjoying every single second of it. He almost didn’t want it to end.
“Let’s go to bed, Spencer,” Hotch whispered in his ear when he finally pulled away from Spencer’s lips. Spencer looked at him, his lips were swollen and red, evidence from the kissing they had been doing. Spencer nodded his head, not trusting his voice not to crack. He stepped back, but his hand was caught. He was used to being stripped on the way to the bedroom, or being pushed in front of Hotch, or having the man like a octopus at his back as they went into the room, but this time he was backed-up towards the room. Hotch kissed him again as his hands worked on Spencer’s pants. He wasn’t shocked when they were shoved down his legs as they crossed the threshold from hallway to bedroom. They didn’t stop moving until Spencer’s legs hit his bed. He tried to sit down but Hotch’s hands on his shoulders kept him up. He busied his hands with Hotch’s pants, finding the older man’s cock hard as he slipped his hands inside of his pants.
Hotch shimmed out of his pants before he pushed Spencer back onto the bed. “Up,” Hotch said as he worked on stripping himself the rest of the way. Spencer scooted up the bed, eyeing the man as he stripped. He went all the way down to skin before he kneed onto the bed to slip between Spencer’s legs. Spencer laid down as the man loomed over him. Lips were on his again and he groaned as hands swept up his legs, brushing the edges of his groin before slipping up under his shirt. He was still in his work clothes and he’d dressed light with no undershirt under his button up.
The hands left him as he tried to keep Hotch right where he was. He hadn’t cared too much before about kissing. It was nice and it was a good way to show that Hotch wasn’t using him, but this, this kind of kissing was addictive. He didn’t want it to end but Hotch pulled away despite the hands on his shoulders to keep him there.
“We have all night,” Hotch said as he brushed his lips down his neck and started to suck a hickey into the pulse point on his throat. Spencer thrust his groin up into him, he was fully hard then. Hotch grabbed his hands and bent them up to where he was pressing them into the bed at his head. His head kept going down, placing kisses down his chest before the hands let him go to work on his shirt. Each button that was popped had a kiss placed on each bit of new skin revealed. Spencer didn’t keep his hands where Hotch had pressed them into the bed, instead he touched. Hotch’s head, shoulders, and whatever he could reach. When Hotch reached the end of his shirt, his hands swept up Spencer’s chest, pushing the shirt down. Spencer sat up so that he could take it all the way off. Hotch kept going down, dragging his underwear with him. It showed his strength how he was able to get them off him without him even lifting up at all. The clothing was tossed to the side as his lips kept going down their path down his legs. Spencer couldn’t reach him without sitting up but when he tried a firm hand on his stomach pushed him back down. His socks were removed with kisses placed on his ankles. Spencer tried to jerk his feet away when he felt lips brushing the sole of his foot. He stopped though when lips turned into a tongue and instead of feeling ticklish when it was near his ankle it was like heat straight to his groin.
“Hotch,” Spencer pleaded as he tried to coax the man up to kiss him or fuck him or do anything to him. A kiss was placed on his hip before it moved to the head of his cock. His body jerked of it’s own accord and he looked down to see Hotch laughing. He tried to chastise the man, but he could only moan when his cock was licked from root to tip. He gripped Hotch’s hair and held him there, not moving. He was close to coming and he didn’t want to. Hotch fought out of his hold but he didn’t go back to his cock, instead he moved up to lick his stomach again as he heard the snap of a lube cap. A gentle finger eased itself between his cheeks and he shifted his legs to where Hotch had better access. Everything felt so good. So good. He could hear the panting that he was doing, didn’t care to try and stop it, or the moans and groans that escaped his lips.
Hotch pulled his finger free to press in a second as he moved up to Spencer’s left nipple. The two fingers pushed in and out of him as Hotch drove him mad with his tongue on his nipple. He tried to not do anything but he couldn’t help pushing back down onto those fingers as they tried to leave him. Hotch moved to his other nipple as he pressed back inside with three fingers, opening him wide and fingering to where he was almost mad with pleasure. He gasped when the fingers were removed and Hotch moved his lips up his neck and onto his mouth again.
“Spencer, can I have you?”
“Yes,” Spencer answered without even thinking. He felt the press of hard cock against his hole and brought Hotch’s face back to where he could kiss him. He only stopped when Hotch was all the way inside of him. He expected Hotch to pull out and slam back in but he didn’t. It was a slow drag of cock out of him before a even maddeningly slow push back inside of him.
Spencer’s brain was fried with pleasure but he wasn’t sure what was wrong. Something was wrong and his mind was trying to fight through the pleasure. He jerked his mouth away from Hotch’s, gasping in a breath to try and clear his mind. Hotch didn’t seem to notice at all. Instead he just placed open mouthed kisses on his cheek before moving down his jaw and then to his ear. He didn’t miss the next words from the man’s mouth.
“I love you, Spencer,” Hotch uttered in a convicted tone in his ear.
It was like a bucket of cold water on his skin, the pleasure left him and all he could hear was those words repeated over and over again. He couldn’t breath and he just laid there. Something had felt different about what Hotch had been doing, but he hadn’t expected that. Hotch had been seducing and now he was making love to him.
“Quantico,” Spencer gasped because he knew it was the one thing to get Hotch to stop without having to resort to violence. Hotch sat up on his knees, gentling pulling his cock from Spencer. Before he could even think about what he was doing he was up off the bed and moved to his dresser. There on top was the sweats and t-shirt he’d been planning on changing into for the day.
“Spencer,” Hotch said as he reached out and closed his hand around Spencer’s shoulder. It was like a wall had come tumbling down on him. Hotch hadn’t called him Reid except at work in weeks, ever since that night with Jack. He’d gotten so used to it that night that he hadn’t realized. Not caring about the lube on his body, Spencer jerked the sweat pants on and then the t-shirt. He didn’t even look at Hotch as he moved towards the living room. He grabbed his wallet and keys and slid on a pair of tennis shoes and took off out of the apartment. He couldn’t deal. He just heard those words over and over in his head. It was like they were on repeat. There was no way that Hotch would run after him naked so, he had a short period of time before the man would be able to follow him.
Spencer sighed in relief as the bus was getting ready to stop at the end of the block. He pulled out his card and swiped it as he stepped up onto the bus. He only wanted to get away. He didn’t care where and he didn’t care how. As he took a seat, he turned to look at the front of his building. He thought that Hotch wasn’t going to run after him, and he didn’t know why that hurt until finally, the doors burst open and there was the man looking around frantic. Spencer turned in his seat and thought about what he was doing. He looked at the bus number and tried to form a plan. He knew where he wanted to go, and it was the only place that he would feel safe that wasn’t his place, or Hotch’s.